Dearest Abby,
When I took these photographs of you on September 9, 2008 I was immediately struck by their symbolism. In the first image I see you clearly in focus and your image is then reflected in the window in a blurry shadow.
In this image, you are blurry in the foreground and your reflection has the focus.
This is how it is for me now.
I can only see a glimpse of you out of focus and a bit blurry.
You are so far from me, yet so near too.
I can't touch you, yet I feel you everywhere.
Abby, you know how my heart is still aching and how deeply I miss you.
I know you hear me when I speak to you, but I also know you cannot answer me.
I tell you the depth of my love and the completeness of it.
I am still unable to comprehend that you are gone.Gone forever.
Oh yes, I know your body is no longer here.
I have this small tiny box that reminds of that every hour of every day.
But, that is not you.
It is only the remains of your physical body.
You are more than ashes Abby.
You are my breath, and my heartbeat, you are the very essence of me.
I know Abby, that you cannot come back to me on this earth.
My head knows this, but my heart does not want to accept that yet.
That heart reaches for you every. single. day.
I don't think it will ever stop reaching for you.
It may not grieve as painfully as it is right now, but I don't believe
there will ever be a day when the first thought upon my waking will not be of you, nor
the last thought on my mind when I lie down my head to sleep. It does not matter to me that there may be those who don't understand what I am feeling, because YOU did.
Till my dying days there will never be another who will capture my heart
as you did. You knew it was immediate. You remember when our eyes locked June 12, 2005? That sealed the deal between your heart and mine. It was something I undertook knowing it would be forever. Death may have separated us on this earth but it did not separate our love. It will live on as long as I am of this earth. Then when my body is no longer here, I will rejoice in finding you waiting for me,
patiently like you always did each time I returned home. I will be returning home for good, to be with you, my dear sweet baby girl. I know for some reason which I cannot fathom, you had to go ahead of me, but I know you will wait. I know you will. We are forever bound together in spirit, you and I.
So for now my sweet girl, you watch over me, guide me and continue to be patient.
I love you Abby.
I
LOVE
YOU
ABBY
Always and Forever Yours,
Faithfully,
Your Momma
You have so many very special memories of Abby. She was a lucky cat to have had you.
ReplyDeletewe have to agree that Abby was extremely lucky to have you.
ReplyDeleteemma and buster
She is guiding you every day. I was looking for some old photos files and found and old one of Abby. I must have edited it for a birthday party. My heart skittered. She is around.
ReplyDeleteYou and Abby have a beautiful love story. (I can relate so much to how you feel as I feel it about my sweet Angel Inka. Purrs and love to you.)
ReplyDeleteMy human felt the same way about the cat before me, and she still misses her a lot.
ReplyDeleteShe will always be with you.
ReplyDeleteThe head peep felt the same way about Rhett, and she still misses him every day. The rest of us keep her busy, but it isn't the same as a heart cat. Nothing is.
ReplyDeleteNo words, just lots of love and Light and purrs.
ReplyDeletePeace.
Be thankful for every as memory they will sustain you until it is time for you to be together for ever. Take care.
ReplyDeleteLuv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
I feel the same about my Robin and Admiral. LOve binds us always. I will see them again. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteSo sweet tribute! lots of meooooooowhugs and kisses
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautifully written love story.
ReplyDeleteHugs madi Angel Abby's bfff
Thank you for pointing out that our link to Notes From a Dog Walker had disappeared! ACK! Such an important post and it wasn't linked. We have fixed it but if blogger will let us:
ReplyDeletehttp://notesfromadogwalker.com/2013/09/07/self-care-is-not-optional-how-burnout-ended-my-career-at-the-shelter/
Oh and no--veterinary staff never know what they are getting into when they start. Trust me on that one!
Beautiful tribute to your Abby.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs to you. It is so hard to lose a fur friend since they are the best friends ever. Take care.
ReplyDeleteHugs from all of us. You know, Abby is trying to answer you, but your ears are useless. You must listen with your heart, and only your heart.
ReplyDeletemom; while my voice may be to far away for you to hear me; my heart and soul are right by your side...love always....abby ~~~~~
ReplyDeleteXOXO
You and Abby are so blessed to have each other. Ditto what Brian said. <<>>
ReplyDeleteDear AbbysMom
ReplyDeleteMine the mom has those same feelings and thoughts every day about The One Who Came Before - Ralphie. She loves us so very very much and she loved gramma trixie and grampa norton to the moon and back too, but Ralphie was her heartbeat and her soul. She still feels that way 12 years after he went to the Bridge, but she says its all good now and it's all light and warmth.
purrrsss to mine gorgeous sweet tuxie Angel
your adoring floofy cocoapuff meezerman Sammy
I've nominated you for the Super Sweet Blogging Award! Concatulations! Visit me for more details: http://swamizoe.blogspot.com/2013/09/a-super-sweet-day-me-ommmmmmm.html
ReplyDeleteMe-Ommmmmm
sending you MUCH LOVE AND MANY MANY (((((Hugs)))))
ReplyDeleteWe're sure she hears everything you say to her. Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Misty May, Mauricio, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo
ReplyDeleteSending you more purrs and hugs from me and mum.
ReplyDeleteContinued hugs and sympathy.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind words for mom about Mars. Such a dear little guy, so affectionate. Hard to think of him being gone.
i thought I left a comment...so so sorry...I just want you to know how much Mom and I luvluvluv reading your glorious memories of a kitty who stole your heart and ran with it to the moon...again, and again, and again...purrrs, Savannah
ReplyDeleteLove you Abby and Mom. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteMarjorie
We're thinking of you in this difficult time. Abby was a lovely girl and she had a great life. We hope this is a comfort...
ReplyDeleteOf Course Angel Abby may have a posthumous Viceroyship! Perhaps we will place her at Harding Park/Lake Merced because there is a lot of beautiful and wild parkland to roam and explore there, and she'd also be high enough up to spot any potential intruders coming by sea in plenty of time to warn me. Stay tuned! More territories will be assigned soon ;-)
ReplyDeleteSending you many many purrs of comfort and warm thoughts from the human.
ReplyDeleteAs for your question about my human taking Milou's pics with her iPhone, my human said Milou (unlike Kitshka who is moving all the time, and me who always decide at the last second that I don't want to have my picture taken) barely moved, so it's easy to focus if the iPhone is not too close. But she's not really satisfied with the grainy quality of it (much noise in the dark) but it comes in handy!
Purrs
Abby still is there - weaving between your legs as you walk - and if you listen, you can hear her soft meow in answer to you.
ReplyDeleteWe can so relate...that's the joy and sorrow of loving too well.
ReplyDeleteThere are so many friends who have walked that path. We send you our love.
What a beautiful tribute. I am the same way about precious Brainball. He's my heart cat. I adore all the Ballicai to the moon and back, they are infinitely precious to me, but yes, there is just something about a heart cat. Your love for sweet Abby is so very beautiful and speaks to all that is precious and gentle in this world. Sending lots of love and big hugs.
ReplyDelete