My Father's Chair

This is my Daddy.

He was a big man.

6'4"

I always thought he was the biggest man

in the world as a child.

And he was.

To me.

My Daddy and my Mother in the 1960's.

In those days Daddy loved his cigars.

***

Born in a small town in Texas in the late 1920's

he was a sharecroppers son.

He grew up on that small farm picking cotton.

He loved that land.

He learned all of his life lessons on that farm

At a very young age, he lost his Daddy to a drunk driver.

I can certainly feel his pain.

Especially now.

He joined the US Navy in 1946,

and as the Navy does he moved away from Texas

eventually to Jacksonville, Florida where he met

and married my Mother in 1948.

They celebrated their 69th wedding anniversary

June 11th of this year.

He worked for 38 for the US Postal Service and

retired in 1984 I believe if memory serves me right.

He enjoyed many of those years after retirement, until in 2001

he had back surgery. That surgery left him disabled 

and slowly destroyed his mobility.

Even through his illnesses and those disabilities

you would never hear him complain.

Both my Mother and I saw many changes recently

which was of grave concern to us.

We were trying just so hard to keep him safely at

home where he wanted to be,

and where we wanted him.

On Tuesday, July 11 sometime during the night

he quietly slipped from this world

to the next one waiting on him

where I know he was joyfully embraced

by his Mother and Father and all his family members

who have gone on ahead.

For much I am grateful.

Grateful he didn't suffer the indignities of

hospitals and hospice and 

more medical interventions.

He naturally left his earth on his own terms

in his chair peacefully through the night.

It is unimportant what exactly caused his death,

it is enough to know he is just gone.

Holding his hand for the final time.

My Father's Chair.

***

My Daddy is gone.

I'm 60 years old and I feel like I'm 6.

I'm lost looking for my Daddy.

I miss him more than I could ever tell you.

It's only been 7 days,

and it could be 7 seconds or 7 years, 

I couldn't tell you which.

I can tell you this.

For the rest of my days I will miss the

greatest man I've ever known.

There is no mortal man who could ever be greater.

Not to me.

Not ever.

Not even close.

He was as I have repeated over and over again

a good man.

I was so fortunate to have had him for so long.

I wish I had him still although I know

how deeply he suffered.

It is that little girl who longs for her Daddy who

will always miss him.

I just want you back Daddy.

I love you so much.

I always will.

Always.

Please be right there waiting for me.

James R Edwards

December 29, 1928

July 11, 2017