Tuesday, July 14, 2020


Last Thursday evening was the final time I saw Mina,
it was July 9, 2020 & I peeked out the window
and all of the cats were asleep
on the driveway.
I gather the concrete is cooler.
It's been very hot here in Florida.

Friday morning I went to feed the cats 
for breakfast.
It is very hot,
and a lot of them don't
Mina did not show up.
I wondered about that,
but didn't make much of it because of the heat.

Dinner came and no Mina.

Nor did she come to breakfast or dinner
on Saturday.
I had gone from a little worry to a lot.
I had called and searched for her each day.

Nothing on Sunday either.

There is always a risk with outdoor cats.

Mina was very fearful.
I checked my records and she appeared
at my door on December 7, 2019 2018.
A scrawny 4-5 month old kitten.
Someone had just dropped her nearby. 

She became friendly with Buddy, another throwaway.
He is a fella that has been with me for several
years and he is half deaf and very goofy.
Totally harmless and Neutered!

Before I knew it Mina mated with the big
gray tomcat that was hanging around her
because she was in heat.
In my ignorance I didn't realize kittens that young
got pregnant. Well she did.

She's playing with Mickey when he was about
2 months old.

The above photo was taken last month,
and she and Mickey are still playing.
He loves his Mom.

Mina was very good at Motherhood.
The photo above is her with the kittens between
1-2 months old.

Enjoyment at the milk bar.

Such a beautiful family.

She loved her kittens,
and  they loved her right back.
Such a bonded group.

Mickey again with his Mom.

Yesterday I came home after being gone all day.
It was 7:30 and I had just fed everyone outdoors
and indoors and I was closing up the window shades.
I looked out into the front yard and I saw Mina's head
peeking out of the tall grass.
I ran outside calling her, expecting her to run to me.
She didn't. She couldn't.
As I grew closer to her I could see she could not 
move her hind legs and she was covered in flies.
I could see some type of injury and I'm not sure
She cried to me, HELP ME.
So I ran as fast as I could to find a blanket
to lift her safely and hopefully not hurt her 
further and also a carrier.
I got her inside and she struggled a little but not much.
You have to understand even after nearly 18 months
Mina would not let me near her.
I had mistakenly tried picking her up one day and
I had blood drawn. She was very fearful.
I was in hyper drive to get her into the car.
I grabbed my phone and called the ER,
the same one I had to take Abby to.
I knew with Covid there was probably a procedure,
and there was.
I got there close to 8:30 and within a few minutes of
doing all the paperwork they came to the car
and took her in.
She didn't make it.
We don't know what happened.
And truthfully it doesn't matter.
She's gone.

I have a tough time with loss.
I understand everyone does.
Even though I am so acquainted with it's feel.
The hollowness is everywhere.
I see the chair which I placed for her empty
and my heart just breaks.
I look at the faces of those kittens who don't have
a clue that their Mom isn't coming back.
My eye swell with tears.
I know they don't have the same outlook as I do
knowing what I know, but it still breaks my heart
knowing that she is not coming back to them.
I pray I made the right decision.
As much as I wanted to save each cat that I have,
I can't. I don't have any wisdom on this.
I don't understand what happened or why.
I'm struggling with not knowing if
the right decision was made,
or if I simply did the wrong thing.

Mina I loved you.
Mina I will miss you
Mina I will try to keep your kittens safe.
As safe as they will allow me.
Mina oh my pretty Mina.
I am so sorry that you were handed such a hard life.
I hope in the short time we shared I made it better.
I tried.
Truly I did.
I kept telling you that if your stayed close by within the 
yard you'd be safe, but I know you liked to roam.
Now you can roam safely and free.
No more worries about the heat, the cold, or rain.
I love you so and my heart is broken
and I so long to see you.
It will take a long time to find peace for myself,
and I will pray for your soul and my own.
Mina be at peace.
Watch over your babies and keep them safe. 


  1. So sad. (((hugs)))

    The Florida Furkids

  2. That's so very sad and we understand how much love can form with those precious feral souls. Rest in peace beautiful Mina, you were totally loved.

  3. I'm so very sorry. I think she must have done her best to make her way back to you, knowing on some level that you would help her. Bless you for being merciful. ♥

  4. My heart breaks for you and the tears are flowing. Mina may have only had 7 months with you, but they were good months where she was loved and well fed.
    When she got injured she knew to come back and you would help take away her pain. She knew she was loved.

  5. Awww, I am in tears just reading this. So very sad, Poor little Mina. I am glad she knew love, even if for a short while, and you have her babies to help remember her by.

    Fly free, Mina, now you are free from pain and stress.

    Sending tons of hugs.

    ((((( ♥ )))))

  6. Oh we are so sorry to read this ! (One of our long time outdoor girls has been AWOL since Saturday) We send prayers to all who love her - your family and the kittens - She is flying free, but oh how she will be missed.

  7. I'm so sorry to read this. I know how much you love your cats, even if they are outdoor community cats. My thoughts are with you.

  8. We are so very sorry. It's so hard to lose one, even an outdoor one but she was lucky to have you, as much as she'd let you.

  9. I am so very sorry; I understand loving ferals...She reminded me of my Mommy Cat at the beginning...Wishing you comfort at this sad time...I am so glad she had you to love her...XO...J, Halle, Sukki

  10. This is so heartbreaking. I am so sorry. XO

  11. I am so sorry, and I can't stop crying. But I am so glad she came back to you and asked for your help. She loved you, she trusted you, her spirit will be part of you forever.

  12. This has just been breaking my heart since I saw the news on FB. Please take comfort in knowing you showed her love and she didn't die alone outside. You have closure too, which is so important. Purrs for you and her precious babies.

  13. oh, I am so sorry! I understand how hard it is. Mina was lovely. thank you for caring for her and her beautiful family. purrs,

    cara, minnie, hollie, sharpie, ditto, TL

  14. I completely totally wholeheartedly know just how you feel and I am so very sorry for it. It's a tragedy. Thank you for loving her and for finding her in time. She knew your love and that is so important. She knew you are her mommy and that you would help. You did though the cost was high. XXOO

  15. We are so very sorry. Mina was lucky to have you care for her and her kittens. Sending you comforting purrs.

  16. We are so sorry. Hugs and purrs for you.

  17. Oh, no. We're so sorry. Thank you so much for loving Mina so mch and so well. She knew you loved her. She did.

    Fly free, sweet Mina. You are loved and cherished always and forever.

  18. Our hearts break for you and the loss of your dear Mina. Bless you for showing her and her kittens such love and compassion. It's clear that despite the hard hand she was dealt, you made her life and the lives of her kittens better. This is just so very hard. Sending you our deepest love and comfort. And gratutude for your generosity of spirit.

  19. This is truly heartbreaking. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. You did the very best that you could do. Sometimes nature is cruel to us. My deepest sympathies. My kitties and I will be sending purrs and prayers your way.
    -Purrs from your friends at www.PlayfulKitty.net

  20. I'm so sorry about Mina. It's so heartbreaking, what hard lives these feral kitties have, and sometimes you can't do much for them, other than be there when they need you. Which you were for her.

  21. I'm so sorry for your loss. Mina was lucky to have come through your yard when she was a kitten. I know you gave her the best life possible in the time you had her. It's unfair and heart shattering when we lose a beloved kitty. I think it's especially difficult when we don't know what happened. At least it was that way for me with my Caster -- not knowing what caused his death wrecked me. So I can empathize with what you might be feeling right now, and I'm so so sorry. Sending hugs and love to you.

  22. May your journey to heaven be swift Mina; we are truly sorry. ♥♥♥


    I hope you realize how grateful Mina was and always will be. She was given a name, a home, shelter, companionship and most importantly; love. I can guarantee that if Mina could speak "human" she would say, thank you, I love you too.

    This is hard; and I understand, completely, but I hope you realize you did YOUR BEST and Mina knows this

    hugs and loves

    L ♥♥♥

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  24. We're in tears, it's so hearbreaking. Purrs and hugs to you

  25. This is terrible news. I feed outsider-cats, too, and one of them is black. Sable had a sister, Sablette. They disappeared and only Sable came back, after a long absence. Yes, outsider-cats are always in danger.

    Mina was probably struck by a car. But she knew to come back to the one human who cared for her, the one who would help her. She must have crawled for days. But she found you, and you didn’t let her down. You did make her life better; she knew you had, and that’s why she came back to you, her human, her home. There was nothing else you could have done. Even if she had survived, Mina could not have lived a decent life. Not because she would have been paralysed but because she was an outsider-cat, one who, as you wrote, liked to roam. You did the right thing.

    God bless you for caring for her and about her. Godspeed, Mina.

  26. I am so very sorry. Mina knew you loved her and that if she could get back to you you would help her, as you did. I am just sorry the outcome couldn't have been a happier one for you both. ((Hugs))

  27. Heartbreaking :'( So sorry for the loss of Mina, but Thankful that you were there for her in the end and her kitties. Soft Pawkisses to comfort your broken heart ♥ ♥ ♥


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