C.July 2005
I was using the reference of the normal size diet coke bottle to show you the scale of how small Abby was. She was only 11" tall. Oddly enough she was also 11" long. She was in my estimation about the size of a 4-5 month old kitten. I wish I could have seen her as a kitten, and to have known her parents and siblings. Was she the runt? Or were they all small?? Her body was typically round which is normal for a Manx. But her head was angular, not rounded which is atypical. But I just loved the way her body was compact and muscular and low to the ground. She truly was a tiny dynamo.
I don't know what was with the paw thing.
MOL
She held it up in the entire series.
I bet she was tired of the flash box going off.
I can look back at all of my older pictures and she how far I've come both in terms of better quality pictures and also better photography skills in capturing animals. Those who have black, or white, or the combo of black and white cats, know how hard it is to photograph black or white. I was happy that I did invest in DSLR camera because it gave me some excellent pictures of Abby, all later in her life, but I still have them and they are my treasures.
*****
I will offer up one piece of advise and it's hard to do because I failed at it, but I am trying to do better. Take pictures.Take LOTS of them. Digital pictures basically only cost your time. You will never regret having too many pictures. I thought I had taken too many pictures, and even though I have over 50000 of the cats throughout the years, that isn't enough. I will I had a zillion more of Abby.
*****
I miss my girl.
Which I know anyone who has lost their kitty, especially their heart kitty does.
It's hard. Even when your home is filled with other felines, it's still hard. I am so grateful I have the four I do but, they are not Abby. Just like Abby was not Boo, or Gracie, or Ping, or Jinx. They are all unique. But, Abby and I well we just had something special going on. She needed me, and I needed her. Now, I have to find a way to contentment with letting her go ahead of me and I must wait until I can be reunited with her. Time keeps ebbing away the very rough edges of the grief, but as the major Holidays approach it will bring renewed sadness. I had one brief moment of clarity when she was so sick in August. I was looking through my photo archives and of course I ran upon the Christmas photos. I knew right then, she would not see another Christmas. I had to shut down that thought at the time, but my head knew her time was so limited. Not as limited as it turned out to be, but limited. So, this Holiday season will be my first without her and it will be different, more bittersweet,less joyful than it might otherwise have been as time grows closer I will share some of the Holiday photos of years past. She was always my little helper when I wrapped packages. She loved boxes and getting into the papers and bows. Oh it's going to be tough this year, can I just skip the holidays this year?
*****
I love you Abby,
to the MOON
and BACK
again, and again and again.
Even in a household of felines, when one is missing the house can seem strangely empty. It's even emptier when the one missing is a Soul Cat. I have no idea how many photos my human has of me, but there are loads of photo cards here and the majority of photos are of me, that I know. Sadly, the cat before me was around before the age of digital photography, so there are not so many photos of her.
ReplyDeleteShe was tiny. Lots of hugs.
ReplyDeleteMom was really happy when she got her new camera in 2010 as Mickey went to the Bridge the following year. Mom also laments not having enough pics of him,but she does have some nice ones.
ReplyDeleteIt is good to remember those not with us,and to love the ones we have.
Yes, take pictures!
Purrs Tillie and Georgia,
Treasure,Tiger, JJ and Julie
I have always taken a BUNCH of photos and absolutely loved it when I got my first digital. Of course, now I only use my iPhone. ;)
ReplyDeleteGracie is little. Only 8 pounds. Well, little compared to the boys. But she's a dynamo and rules the roost, for sure.
Big hugs xoxo
There are so few photos of the head peep's earlier cats, before the days of digital photography. Now there's no need to go to a photomat (people probably don't even remember those!), so we agree... take lots and lots of photos and save them. And back them up! A good friend of ours lost a lot of photos of his former cats in a crash, and he said it was like losing them all over again.
ReplyDeleteI don't think even a DSLR camera would make the Staff take better pictures *sigh*. Abby will always be missed but the grief will wane over time! Such a sweet girl. xox
ReplyDeleteShe may have had a tiny body, but her personality was huge. :-)
ReplyDeleteBe kind to your Self, it's not even quite 2 months since she passed.
I dimly remember the first Christmas without Annie and it seemed "off", not to have her around and under the tree, but perhaps because she had passed in February and the better part of a year had gone by, it didn't bother me as much I expected it would. Or maybe, as often is the case, the anticipation is worse than the actual event.
It's so hard to be in the Present, isn't it? Non-humans seem to do it naturally, but alas, we can't.
Abby was your heart cat and you will miss her very much on your the first Christmas without her.
ReplyDeleteMum hasn't got many pictures of her "before us cats" as she didn't have a digital camera then but now she has far too many of us!!!
Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx
Now I want to measure Annie, who's the shortest kitty I've ever known but maybe Abby was smaller. I love Abby's paw in those pictures. It's so hard missing them.
ReplyDeleteYour pictures are always wonderful of all your kitties!
I'm so glad I took a lot of pictures of Sweet Praline. I want to get a new camera because it's so hard to get good pictures of Truffle and Brûlée with their coloring.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are with you as you grieve the loss of Abby.
teeny tiny angel Abby!!!!! I love you so sweet tuxie angel!
ReplyDeletepurrrsss n nosekissies - your forever adoring floofy cocoapuff meezerman Sammy
So many of the kitties that came before us never had a single photo taken of them because our humans didn't even own a camera (not one that worked anyway, they say). We're glad that you got lots of photos of sweet Abby. Love the paw thing! Thanks for sharing her with us! Purrs...
ReplyDeleteThank you for your bloggie comment. We can confirm that those dancing lights include all cats - with and without tails. Because they swirl around so fast, there are a few paws and whiskers that dance away, and maybe if you look hard enough you an see that. Äti was thinking of Abby when she said too many good 'uns have left. But the northern lights are a way - we think - they keep in touch with us in spirit, and we are privileged to see them from where we live.
ReplyDeleteThey do indeed reach out to the Moon, and back.
OMC - she was a tiny little girl. But, oh so beautiful. I keep taking pictures of Mario too. Just bought a new Nikon and have been having fun with it. (It's the higher end of a point and shoot).
ReplyDeleteAbby you were precious precious kitty. Oh how tiny...lots of love in that itty bitty kitty though.
ReplyDeleteAbby loved Christmas and activities, you must do them for her and I expect she has appointed one of the others to be an elf helper this year.
Hugs Madi your bfff and Mom
Such true words, that cats are all unique. They are their own little selves. I am sorry that there wasn't digital cameras when I had all my other cats. I never took enough pictures period.
ReplyDeleteThose are great pictures of Abby. Some of the cats here are very small too. Have a great day.
Dear sweet Abby sure had lots of love in that sweet little package.
ReplyDeleteAbby was tiny, but she was larger than life, and filled a huge part of your heart. Sending continued and constant purrs and prayers and hugs.
ReplyDeletewe bee noe inn how yur mom feels abby...trout towne bee way emptee with out sauce of fishbone; tuna still looks for him everee day.... but sauce iz in a far far better place trout towne could ever hope ta bee N ya never noe... abby mite bee closer than ya think....
ReplyDeletede blessings oh St Francis two everee one N heerz ta a grate week oh end
My Admiral flew away a few weeks before Christmas and it was very difficult not having my baby there. I understand how you feel...and while our loss is blunted with the passage of time, the wishing and missing are always strong. xoxox
ReplyDeleteoh she was tiny. but has a gigantic personality.
ReplyDeleteabout the half raised paw - my emma does that when she's waiting for her wet food to come and I'm taking extra long time to give it to her. the first time she did this my hubby and i cracked up.
Emma and Buster
merveilleuses photos
ReplyDeletebises
So petite! I think she's just posing pretty for the camera! Me-Ommmmmm
ReplyDeleteShe was such a tiny little girl, but she left a big impression on everyone.
ReplyDeleteShe was such a tiny cat...but full of big love. Purrs.....
ReplyDeleteThe first holiday season without my Finny was hard. Big hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteShe was small but her heart was huge. I used to hold my paw u like that too.
ReplyDeleteAbby sure was petite. The first Christmas will be hard. Sending you lots of hugs.
ReplyDeleteLing lifts up her paw the same way when it's dinner time. As soon as the spoon hits the metal bowl, she lifts up her paw and keeps it up until the bowl is placed in front of her. Her Daddy likes to clank the bowl on purpose just to see that. :)
It is really hard to imagine just how small Abby was since she filled such a large portion of your heart. We know just how hard the holidays will be having lost kitties even closer to those occurring, but just think about the happy memories while you're wrapping and bowing the gifts. That's what Abby would want you to do. Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo
ReplyDeleteWow, can I identify with that! I wish Ryker, my Soul Cat, had been younger when digital photography began. And I so wish I had invested in my dslr back THEN and not just 3 months ago!!!
ReplyDeleteHaving a camera with a good sensor, rapid shutter speed, and good glass makes all the difference. And I, too, have learned the hard way that there are never enough photos.
I do *so* feel where you're coming from. Never in my life have I wanted reincarnation to exist more than when I lost Ryker. (And oddly, Faraday has his personality - it's almost as if G-d did grant me this one thing, maybe?)
Those are such sweet pictures of the tiny Abby. I know what you mean and can relate to what you are saying about the loss of one's heart kitty. It is so very hard. Purrs and love to you.
ReplyDelete((((((((((hugs)))))))))) I can so relate. I adore all the Ballicai with all my heart, but Brainball is the Heart Kitty of my life. So true, too, that we can never have enough pictures of our precious furballs. Thinking of you and sending purrs and love!
ReplyDeleteI know EXACTLY what you mean! I always think I have SO MANY pictures of the cats. Then one passes and I feel like I have none. I would offer the same advice - take as many pictures as you can!!
ReplyDelete