Friday, August 12, 2022

Nine

 



It's been nine years.
I can't believe it.
I can't believe all the major shifts
that have happened since
that sad faithful day your little
damaged heart stopped beating 
as I held you in my arms.
It may be melodramatic, but I felt
that you would only want me 
to be the one holding onto you as you let go.
It is a moment that will never leave me.


I read a story not too long ago
about a cat that was abused by a child
and rehomed because the parents felt it was
the cat's fault it was becoming 'dangerous'.


It struck home because that is what happened to you.
But it was the Father who hated you and abused you.
And you were very hostile to men.
You were hostile and temperamental for quite some time
after I got you and of course you were 6.
So you had experienced quite a bit of abusive behavior.


You tested me.
Boy how, did you ever!
But not once did I ever scold you.
I persevered.
 I fell in love with you from the first second,
and I needed to gain your trust.
I know I finally did,
and you repaid me greatly with your loyalty.



You had a wonderful life and you were the 
Queen of your kingdom.
But you were quite bossy and no matter what, you took
nothing from anyone.
Including me!
You kept us all in order.
That first morning when I walked into the house
after you had gone, 
it was so hard, 
because you always waited for me at
the back door. Not seeing you there was devastating.
And it still is. Because you are still everywhere in
this house.
Even though it's been 9 years, right at this moment
it feels like only yesterday.
I will grieve for you as long as I live,
my grief is the testament to the depth of my
love for you.
Our bond is rock solid.
Even though you are in a place I can't see.
I know you're waiting for me.


There are losses that rearrange the world.
Death that changes the way you see everything,
grief that tears down everything. Pain that 
transports you to a different universe, even when 
everyone else is thinking nothing 
has really changed.
~Megan Devine

I love you
to the 
Moon
and 
Back
....
again
and
again
and 
again.

Love always and forever,
Until I see you again...
xoxoxo
Your ever faithful Mom

7 comments:

  1. Hugs on this sad anniversary. The pain never goes but changes, softens. Then suddenly it will come back and bite as hard as it did on that heartbreaking day.

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  2. Sending you hugs as you remember your beautiful girl. XO

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  3. Nine years...since Abby got her wings...I know you miss her as she was your heart cat.
    Hugs cecilia

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  4. It doesn't matter the length of time, the hurt still hurts. Hugs from us.

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  5. Thank you for sharing so much of Abby's story. She was a very special cat indeed.

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  6. That she waited for you to come home every day is proof of the trust you won from her, and the love. Not everyone is rewarded in such a way. You were very fortunate to have her, and she was very fortunate to have you. God bless you.

    ReplyDelete

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