An Abby Selfie for Selfie Sunday

Abby is joining

THE CAT ON MY HEAD

for this week's

SUNDAY SELFIE

blog hop.

***

I adopted Abby 11 years ago today.

It was June 12, 2005

I will forever remember seeing her in

her tiny igloo up on top of 

all of the cages. Just sitting straight up,

unafraid.

Poor girl, not knowing what was going on.

Not understanding how she'd been

ripped from the family she known

for many years.

Not knowing she wasn't going back there.

Not knowing that what lay ahead for her

was far better than what was behind her.

I gave you my promise Abby

I promised to love you and care for you always.

And I still do.

***

Remembering Abby

#TBT

Grief

is the last act of love we have to give

to those we loved.

Where there is deep grief,

there was great love.

In A Perfect World

 In a perfect world

no one's heart is ever broken.

 In a perfect world 

you wouldn't be so far away.

In a perfect world

it's all so clear to me.

I can close my eyes and see the way it all should be.

In my perfect world

my arms are still around you.

Forever isn't out of reach.

If only we could be 

in

a

perfect

world.

Sorrow To Joy

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.”
― Rumi

I think that this the last day of what I consider one of the most challenging years of my life, I am hoping that the above quote from Rumi is true. I am hopeful for things to take the place of the sorrow that I have been feeling. Not necessarily better, but different. I will never ever feel nothing but gratefulness for having my beloved Abby in my life for 8 years and 61 days. I wish I could have had 80 years and a million days with her but it wasn't meant to be. I know Abby would not want me to be sadden by her loss. I think she would prefer I celebrate her life and I will. I am glad to have Annabelle bring in a youthful happiness of life into this house again. I believe that she and I were meant to find one another, and that's the way that was meant to be. The old cliche about life working in mysterious ways is undoubtedly true. We are better off allowing things to happen and accepting whatever they are. So, I shall try very hard to leave the sadness behind in 2013 and move onward in 2014. I am sure my tears will still fall and that I will continue to miss the physical presence of my beloved Abby, but I know she is still here, only different. She still communicates with me, just differently. I guess she lets me know something when she thinks I most need it, and that has been most true in something we will share later this week. But, I have no doubt she is here, and that she always will be. I will continue to share her because she still has stories to tell, and because I love talking about her, even if I shed a few tears in the process. Abby I'll always always love you to the Moon and back, always. That will always be our special mantra.
So Farewell 2013.
Welcome 2014.

Go With Your Heart

Wherever
you go
GO
with your heart.
~Confucius

Already There

I'm already there
Don't make a sound
I'm the beat in your heart
I'm the moonlight shining down
I'm the whisper in the wind
And I'll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I'm already there

We may be a thousand miles apart
But I'll be with you wherever you are

I'm already there
Take a look around
I'm the sunshine in your hair
I'm the shadow on the ground
I'm the whisper in the wind
And I'll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I'm already there
Oh I'm already
There  

***
The background on the photograph in case it's hard to see is that I am sitting beneath Abby looking up into the morning sun as it streams in. My hand is near her face. There is no photoshop other than to turn the photo to B/W, that is the sun's natural rays spilling out with Abby being back lit.
The song is by Lonestar, I'm Already There.

Thankful Thursday In The Garden

Today is Meow Like A Pirate day and we wanted to be a part of the festivities...so we let Angel Abby dream her dream of finding some ale and treasure!

Meowwwwwwwwwwww.....

Gracie Welcomes you to our Special
Thankful Thursday In The Garden.

Gracie: I don't know why Momma has been outside running around chasing butterflies, but she has and this is the one she wanted so much to capture on film. She says this is Abby's Butterfly.

So beautiful.

It's our Daddy's purrday today.
He is older than Momma, and
she is as old as dirt.
So, how old does that make him?
O-L-D!

Happy birthday Daddy!
*kisses*
So this is how Momma spent her time in the garden this week.
Chasing butterflies.

Momma says do you see the resemblances?
It may all be in her head, because she sees Abby everywhere she looks.
***
But, the butterfly is so beautiful,
as beautiful as my dear sweet beloved girl.
Momma misses you baby.
Misses you like nobody's business.

c.July 2011

Abby I love you to the
MOON
and BACK
again
and again
and
again.

Abby's Journey -- August 1-13, 2013 In Pictures

8-1-2013

8-2-2013

8-3-2013

8-4-2013

8-5-2013

8-6-2013

8-7-2013

8-7-2013

8-8-2013

8-9-2013

8-10-2013

8-11-2013

8-11-2013

8-12-2013

8-13-2013
***
Today marks one month since Abby began her journey to her true forever home.
Fly Free Abby, Fly little one Fly.

Abby's Journey -- Flow

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your

laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper the sorrow carves into your being,

the more joy you can contain.

-Kahlil Gibran

Where I go to talk to Abby each morning.
*****
In the real world, tragedies and losses affect us deeply and profoundly. We cannot forget the past and we certainly do not remained unscarred from them. Each loss affects us irrevocably. When someone we loves dies, the deepest loss of all, a part of us dies with them, and life will never, ever be the same.
How can we expect to love someone, lose someone -- and not be changed inexorably? How could we think it would be a speedy process? Isn't it more likely that grieving will have aftershocks of loss for the rest of our lives? Grief morphs through time, and that person before the loss is forever changed. Healing will happen because everyone finds ways of healing. Those raw jagged pangs of acute grief will fade but just like a deep wound would leave a lasting scar, a profound loss will leave a deep emotional scar that will at times be very painful. Grief is not a short term process; I don't even believe it's a long term process; I believe it is a life time process. Grieving for Abby will become integrated into each layer of my life. It will be apart of who I am going forward. It will continue to be redefined now and forever as does my relationship with Abby. Death will not end my relationship with Abby, it will forge a new one -- one rooted not on her physical presence in my life but on her memory, her dauntless spirit and our love.
Grief is a universal human experience cutting across all boundaries.
It is a fluid lifelong process to make meaning out of loss.
*****
Yesterday I was finally able to go out in the Blogosphere and look at the many tributes and memorials for my girl. I would like to list the ones that I found that so honored her and express my gratitude for your kindnesses in remembering her. There is much truth in saying that something in me heals in connecting with all of you, you help me to connect to my girl through memories and recollections. Thank you for sharing her.

1. Meezer Tails -- Sammy, Miles
2. Cat Post Intelligencer -- Chey, Gemini,Ichiro
3. Island Cats-- Wally, Ernie, Zoey
4. On A More Personal Note -- Stella O'Houligan
5. Brian's Home -- Brian and all of his sisters
6. Cat Wisdom --Merlin, Odin, Gris Gris
7. Derby & Ducky
8. Four White Paws -- The Cat Guy
9. Catitude -- Quinn & Angel Brandi
10. George Clooney -- & Neytiri
11. Sometimes Cat Herd You --Pierre, Ashton, Newton & the cousins
12. The Cat On My Head-- all 9 of you
13. Mark's Mews--Ayla, Iza, Marly & TBT
14. Cat Chat -- Cody & Caren
15. Jasper McKitten --Jasper, Josie, Maggie & Huggy Bear
16. Fuzzy Tails -- Derry & Nicki
17. Madi & Mom
18. Emma & Buster
19. Cats of the Wild Woods
20. Katie Isabella
21. Timmy Tomcat
22. Simba's Antics -- Simba & Audrey
23. Fl Furkids--Raz, Allie,Ellie, Angels Sniffe,Clifford &Tamir
24. The Cat Blogosphere.
25. Felines Follies -- Angel Sandy and little Abb
26. Cherry City Kitties 
27. Life From A Cat's Perspective -- Samantha, Clementine, Maverick & Mr Tigger

*****
If I have missed anyone I would really like to honor you so please let me know.
*****
A very good and kind soul shared something with me yesterday that helped me take a small step in this grief journey I am on. I mentioned in my update yesterday on Boo's posting that I was feeling I was getting farther and farther away from Abby as the day she left me was slowly fading into the past. But, she shared with me this thought: instead of thinking about moving from her, think about moving towards her. I am one step closer to being reunited with my girl as I move forward. I know she will wait for me to be with her and she just took the lead in this journey ,somehow there is comfort in that for me as I hate to think I have lost her for all my time left. So YES I took my friend's advise and last night at 9:55PM I went outside, I looked up at the Moon which here was shrouded in clouds and I told my girl:
I love you Abby
to the MOON
and back
again and again and again.
But Abby I am stepping towards you.
I am one day closer to being there with you.
Momma is coming.
But I have to take small baby steps.
Wait for me baby.
Watch over me until I can get there.
*****

	#pawcircle (@Pawcircle)
8/14/13, 7:18 PM Please light a candle for Abby @manxmnews Group *abbys* Candles - Light A Candle gratefulness.org/candles/candle… #pawcircle

For Abby

I love you
to the moon
and back
again
and again
and
again.
Prayers for Abby today.

Abby