Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Blogoversary


C.2010
Abby is sitting on the back of my chair.
I just like this photo.

***
Today,
12 years ago
that little black and white cat
inspired me to document
her life.
This blog began solely for 
the purpose of doing just
that.

***
I didn't know much about blogging
in those days. In fact I only
knew of a handful of bloggers,
some who are still blogging today.
Most of the 'old-timers'
have left for a lot of different
reasons.

***
I often found it understandable,
but sad that when the cat passed,
the person would stop blogging.
You form attachments and it's
hard to feel that loss.

***
It never occurred to me when I started
blogging Abby's life, that I would
lose her. I know, shake your head,
I understand. But it became apparent
after those first few losses of other
cat friends that one day it would happen 
to me....and it did in 2013.

***
I lost her and my world for that 
reason and many others
has never been the same.
But, I am so very lucky
that girl came into my life,
and even though I miss her
so deeply, everyday, I am 
grateful.
So grateful.

***
So today I celebrate the reason
for the creation of this blog
and 12 years of blogging.
Even though the blog
has transitioned from it's 
original muse it still continues on
in her voice.
It helps so much to keep her 
memories alive and also 
to create new ones.
Thank you all for joining 
in her ride.


Monday, August 14, 2017

Happy Gotchas


Mr Jinx


Boo


Ping

It's GOTCHA day for my trio.
For those who do not know,
the 3 of them were abandoned
near my house in 2004.
Jinx brought them up to the door,
he was just hungry,
and they've been here 
ever since.

***
I often say that it was a good thing
that the person who did this,
did for them
as they've been well loved
and cared for since that day.
So, we will call it
a good thing that they
arrived unannounced
and have lived happily
ever after.

***
Happy 13th Gotcha
to my beautiful trio!

Sunday, August 13, 2017

#sundayselfies


Annabelle is joining
for this week's
#sunday selfie
blog hop.

Hope to see everyone there!

Saturday, August 12, 2017

Resilience



Merriam Webster defines resilience as the capability to recover or to adjust to misfortune or change.

***
Sometimes I believe one's ability to cope with grief depends on their own determination to just get up everyday and face the world. To stand in the deep shambles of a life crushed into a million teeny tiny shards, and declared : I don't know how or when, but somehow I'm going to survive this . Everyday is spent struggling to put those teeny tiny pieces of the past back together whole, until you realize you can't. There isn't any way to put it back together the way it once was.

***
So the days and months and even years are spent feeling troubled, resentful, in deep sorrow and outrage. There are rages against injustice of the realities, feeling deceived out of what could have, should have might have been. In all that pain, still one does not give up. There is still the desire to try and make sense of it all, until in a moment of clarity you see you can't put it back together the way it was. But you have to take what's left over in the rubble and turn it into something different.

***
So again you begin to rebuild, despite set backs,
failures and low spirits,
 you keep going.

When you have a terrible day, you still get up and go through the next one.

When you see images that bring tears of sadness, you cry, it's OK.

When friends & family let you down, you forgive them.

When life seems worthless and pointless, you hold out hope
that you will feel different,
with time.


There is no question each day you will feel weak and alone.
Maybe even believing you are the only one who feels this way.
You're not.
You're not alone,
and you're not alone in feeling the way you do.

***
But you keep picking up the pieces and rebuilding.
You are rebuilding an entire world, your world.
But what you fail to acknowledge is that each day,
each one is a act of resilience, against grief,
and it demonstrates the immense strength you possess.
You will stumble, yes, and you will fall.
You may even buckle completely.
But as long as you get up and keep trying you will grow 
stronger.
It may not feel like it but you will.
And one day,
it will not feel as bad and then you'll reach a tomorrow
where resilience will win.

***
Abby
7/1/99
8/12/13

Thursday, August 10, 2017